Whinging

It occurred to me today, right about the time I found another patch of gray hair on the top of my head, that life is not boring. In fact, it's quite un-boring. It lacks boredom in such a way I wish I'd had a bit of boredom saved up for when I had run out.

You see, a few years ago I went back to school with the intention of working toward a Bachelor's degree in...something. At first I couldn't decide in what I wanted to major in and I was very vague about my answers. Depending on the day you asked me, I was getting a degree in Art History/Anthropology/Teaching/Psychology with a minor in Creative Writing/Spanish/Linguistics/Social Work (you know, in case none of the other stuff worked out). In other words, I didn't really have a goal, I was just interested in learning anything I could. And with my company's generous tuition assistance, it was a pretty sweet gig. 

The point was, I was bored. I was so bored with my so-called professional life, I couldn't stand to be around myself anymore, and I needed a little more stimulation than my writing, drawing, and PlayStation were giving me. So I went back to school.

At the time I started class, my company also didn't care what you were getting a degree in, they were willing to pay no matter what. Then the economy tanked in 2008 and in '09 they changed the rules a bit to reflect that tuition assistance was only for a business or business-related degree. I was able to fake it for a couple semesters, then it got down to the last few credits of my Associates in Whatever and I couldn't fake it any more. I was broke, though, so I did the sensible thing--I changed my major to Business. Oh well, whatever, right? I was undecided anyway and how bad could it be? OK, so I'd have to take a few Accounting classes (ugh), and Macroeconomics (ugh, ugh) and Business Law and here's this Business Writing class. I know how to write. Should be a piece of cake.

Coincidentallt, since the beginning of the semester, my life has really started to speed downhill at work. I've taken on no less than three major projects, one of which I am the head of, which is to basically redesign our entire online archive system, both in file structure and in visual format. Add to this the fact that I've also taken over updating all our resources on a daily basis, which I get about 100 requests a week to do, not to mention the 10 other emails I get a day that were either escalated or never requested properly and need to be done RIGHT DAMN NOW. Add to THAT the fact that I have only ONE other person helping me with all of this, of which we get two hours a day to try and hammer these requests out (except Mondays since that's our busiest day), which all total, comes to about 8 hours a week between the two of us.

By the way, did I tell you I'm still technically just a regular phone jockey? I'm not even senior status yet, though I should be. It's not for my boss not trying--he is so in my court it's practically his court now. Upper management is just...slow. Huh. Imagine that.

I've even been working off the clock here and there (and so has my partner) to get this stuff done. It's becoming a critical issue, especially when we get shafted out of 6 hours of project management time in a week that we desperately NEED just to keep our heads above water.

So I come home late after about three things blew up on me at work about an hour before I left, knowing I have about four hours of homework I have to manage to cram in before midnight or I pass out, whichever comes first, only to find out my assignments were due today at 5:30.   I had a mini melt-down and a glass of wine, and now I'm here.

See, six months ago, I couldn't WAIT to get out of work. The clock would hit 4:30, and I'd be out of there so fast my headset was still hanging cartoonishly in the air behind my tracks. I'd go to class and learn something I hadn't before and come home feeling extremely satisfied with myself because I was DOING SOMETHING. Now I'm doing MANY somethings. In fact, I'm doing so many somethings I'm too tired to enjoy the OTHER somethings I also like to do that have nothing to do with all those other things. Like drawing and writing and playing games on my PlayStation.

The upshot of all this is that my semester ends in about 3 weeks. I've never been this close to failing a semester, or at least feeling like it. It's like when your savings account drops below $100 and you get a little edgy knowing something could clear any moment and you'll be wiped out 'till next payday. The same goes with the B I'm barely maintaining in both my classes. It doesn't help when I forget assignments.

So after this semester is over, I'm going to take a little break from school for the rest of the year. Get my feet steady at work, and figure out how to do the stuff I used to enjoy doing on my own that doesn't feel like work. It's not an easy decision, but right now I'm not sure I can take on any more somethings.

Another Loser Video Gamer…

I have a good paying job, I do NOT live in my mother’s basement, I do NOT own a Captain Kirk costume. But I play video games, so I guess that makes me a loser.

Oh but wait, I’m a chick so that means I’m cool and I don’t have to be a total basement-dwelling mouth-breather to have played the Prince of Persia games. A game franchise, might I add, that earned 6 Guinness World Records that include record for “Highest Rated Platformer on PS2 and X-box.”

Forget the bullshit “level 10″ in Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones, because not every video game has Pac-Man-like levels, particularly ones that tell a narrative storyline like PoP. It took me OVER 15 HOURS to finish Two Thrones. I didn’t have an audience for most of that. And when my friends DID watch it was because it was a compelling story with interesting characters, not to watch me die over and over while they hung around in the background and played “air controller.”

So I ask you, WHO ARE THE REAL LOSERS IN THIS CLIP?

ANSWER: Ubisoft for lending out their otherwise awesome title to a bunch of idiot television writers who think we all sit around in our mother’s basements wearing Captain Kirk uniforms as we play video games.